Hi! My name's Naomi!

I go to UCSC and I have 8 boyfriends. One for every day of the week and twice on Sunday.

I aspire to be a famous singer when I grow up. I already write amazing lyrics and I have a billion friends. Sometimes I sit around and think about how amazing I am and it just brings me to tears. Why can't everyone be as amazing as me?

I sit in class and I dream about going on tour with famous people. Like Taylor Swift, Ed Sheeran, Adele, and Beyonce. Together, we would be an amazing group. I would be the lead singer and lead lyricist. We would have such a good time together. Our voices would harmonize and a new religion would start because of us. It would be great.

Until TSwizzle and Adele fell in love with me. And then I'd have to break their hearts. Then they would go write sad love songs about how I broke their hearts. Then our group would have a big falling out and it would get so public Obama himself would have to step in and be like "Yo! Dis sh*t is bananas!" And then TSwizzle and Adele would agree to learn to live with broken hearts. Then Chris Evans and Robert Downey Jr. would begin to go to premieres with me because that's how amazing we would all be.

It would get to the point where when the next Avengers movie comes out I'd have to be cast as the main villian, because that's how close I would get to the cast and crew. That would be craycray.

Often I go to Children's Centers where the children gather around my amazing self, and I advocate against illegal drug usage. I have been known for my famous quote "CRACK IS WHACK YO".

I've met TSwizzle before. We were on tour opening up for Ne-Yo. He's a pretty cool dude. Here's a picture TSwizzle and I took together on tour:

Here are some things I like to write about:
And here is a list of top 3 favorite Taylor Swift CDs:
  1. Fearless
  2. Red
  3. Speak Now

By the way, this is a joke. I don't have any boyfriends.

Contact Me.
Here's a link to my tumblr.