Andy's Guide to Buying the Right Avocados
Hello, my name is Andy. Although I think all Avocados are garbage, I will show you what the perfect avocado taste like, and looks like, in respect to society's standards.
You can send me an email at, firstname.lastname@example.org ,but I won't read it, as I will be preparing my destruction of all avocados and their respective lineages.
Additionally, here is a video of a avocado being smashed.
These are the steps to determining the perfect avocado!
These are additional steps reccomended by chef Andy himself!
- Place avocado in hand.
- Squeeze the avocado with your fingertips gently.
- If the avocado does not yield, it is not ripe.
- Find an avocado that gives and feels slight soft for immediate use or consumption.
- After finding the avocado, put it on your dominant hand.
- Chuck that shit right across the room, all avocados are despicable.